PCs

Because PCs are, by definition, unorganized pieces of shit, I have like a half dozen different programs that burn CDs. And they all came with the computer.

Sonic, realizing this, developed this splash screen that only stays up for like a three seconds as you open the program, thus guaranteeing that I'll use their product. If they were smarter, they'd have hundreds of different similar photos that displayed randomly each time you opened the program. Maybe each one would get progressively more suggestive, making you burn unnecessary CDs like a motherfuck.

Note the hint of nip.